Weekend in Gatlinburg Part 1: The Journey

Sunday night. 8:30 pm. I literally can not even keep my eyes open, and I feel like in the past 48 hours I have entered and abandoned a parallel dimension. But I can not go to bed without documenting this story, because otherwise it may not be real.

First of all, if you have not read my story about my weekend in Crossville, please do so now because it really adds some context to the story. Every January, my friend Jessica and her family from Crossville rent a huge cabin in Gatlinburg, TN and invite everyone and anyone to join in the weekend. Gatlinburg is a mountain town in the Smokey Mountains, about 4 hours east of Nashville and is a hotspot for tourists and cabin getaways. I was basically expecting a smaller version of Banff. That was not the case.

First of all, the last 30 minutes of the drive into Gatlinburg (the area called Pigeon Forge. Which now that I think about it is a completely ridiculous name) is absolutely dotted with ridiculous tourist traps. I mean, over-the-top, "is this really happening" sort of cheesy unnecessary attractions that are so hilarious they are amazing. I honestly really want to go back in the summer and stay in one of the seedy motels, using my coupon book to it's full extent. I started to lose my mind upon realizing it was still "Christmas" (no doubt the tourist commission attempting to extend holiday tourism).

Literally never seen this many odd Christmas displays

As we carried on down the highway, I saw a lumberjack dinner theater, haunted mansion, house of wax, old time photo parlors and villages, roller coasters, water slides, a hot-air balloon you can actually fly in, indoor skydiving, Dolly Parton-themed stores, uncountable numbers of themed motels, "putt-putt courses" and souvenir shops, the "Smoky Mountain Opry", and this...

What? An upside-down house? How??

It's the Titanic! You can touch a real iceberg!

Obviously by this point I was freaking out (sorry to my car mates Jenny and Cary), and we thought we may never actually make it to the cabin. But, we pulled into the actual town of Gatlinburg, and turned half a mile up the "mountain" to our lovely little (okay, not so little!) cabin in the woods. And cracked a hard-earned cold one!

Cary, Jenny and I after our long journey. Notice I look slightly
more elated about the Titanic than they do.
But they were very good sports!

My eyelids are literally closing, but check back tomorrow for the account of the day spent in Gatlinburg...I swear it just gets better!